Chip-free John Hays
sets off from the Hollybush. But will he ever get there? |
In the beginning it was all
very simple. God made British Bikes and I had a Triumph Tiger Cub.
My budget was £50 and the bike cost me £45. The remaining fiver went on
third party insurance, which left me with no money for crash helmet. In
those days they weren't compulsory and anyway I had a fine head of
thick, curly hair. These days helmets have to be worn but the hair has
gone. A coincidence or a cunning government plot to make all bikers
baldies?
But back to the beginning. To keep the bike
on the road I had a set of rusty feeler gauges and a plug spanner. To keep
warm I relied on a battered leather jacket. As a back up I put on a pair
of women's tights under my jeans and shoved copies of the Daily Mirror
down the front. Finally, to find my way I had a battered map of Wales and
a tourist information leaflet from the Isle of Man.
This was British biking at its best. I was
often cold and wet, frequently broken down far from home and usually lost.
But it was fun and, although I didn't know it at the time, I was learning
my basic trade as a biker. |
Terry 'No Chips'. Last
of the rebel riders? |
Today technology has totally
taken over. Bikes and bikers both have chips with everything.
When I take my T-Sport in for a service they
plug it into a computer. Chips control the fuel flow, take over the timing
and tell the 'mechanic' what bits to bin, when and why. My rusty feeler
gauges are forgotten and breakdown assistance is just a mobile phone call
away.
When the weather looks wet and windy I wrap
up in my aluminium-lined windproof, waterproofs wearing just a T-Shirt
underneath. The ladies tights are no longer strictly necessary - but then
some habits are harder to break. Even the worry about getting lost has
gone lost thanks to global positioning technology.
This is comfort biking at its best. You are
rarely cold and wet, need never worry about breaking down and can always
be sure of knowing not only where you are but where you want to go and the
best way to get there. |
No Lid, No Chips & No
Worries for Joe on his Indian |
But are all these silicone
chips just comfort food for the modern motor cyclist?
Maybe the men in suits set out to tame us with
all this technology. If you take the risk out of riding do you also take
the rebel out of the rider?
It could all be part of the same plot that
began when crash helmets came in and my hair started to come out...
Paddy |